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Peter's winter

Posted by Cab Treadway 
January 06, 2009 01:30PM
Archie, does this sound right? I thought you Canadians were tough but this message has me wondering...

Day 2 Vancouver Blizzard December 2008-

Chilled Vancouver commuters faced their second day of winter hell today, as an additional ¼ centimetre of the peculiar white stuff fell, bringing the lower mainland to its knees and causing millions of dollars worth of damage to the marijuana crops. Scientists suspect that the substance is some form of frozen water particles and experts from Saskatchewan are being flown in. Dogs, especially large, thick coated breeds such as Bernese Mountain Dogs seem afflicted with a manic type behaviour when coming in contact with the stuff. With temperatures dipping to the almost but not quite near zero mark, Vancouverites were warned to double insulate their lattes before venturing out.

Vancouver police recommended that people stay inside except for emergencies, such as running out of espresso or biscotti to see them through Vancouver 's most terrible storm to date. The local Canadian Tire reported that they had completely sold out of fur-lined sandals.

Drivers were cautioned to put their convertible tops up, and several have been shocked to learn that their SUV's actually have four wheel drive, although most have no idea how to use it.

Weary commuters faced soggy sushi, and the threat of frozen breast implants. Although Dr. John Blatherwick, of the Coastal Health Authority reassured everyone that most breast implants were perfectly safe to 25 below, down-filled bras are flying off the shelves at Mountain Equipment Co-op.

"The government has to do something," snarled an angry Trevor Warburton. "I didn't pay $540,000 for my one bedroom condo so I could sit around and be treated like someone from Saskatchewan ."

1990 325i(s)
2004 325XiT
January 06, 2009 03:23PM
That is closer to the truth than you know grinning smiley
January 06, 2009 04:46PM
haha that is pretty funny stuff.

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